For i am weak and pessimistic
Life is always filled with half empty glasses
Which I keep trying to fill to no avail.
I know i will be damned eternally,
But that to me now is preferable
Than the vast empty land which resides in my heart
I am unloved , friendless and worthless,
And for the 34 years that i have lived,
My heart has always been a lonely unoccupied specter
And after fighting for so long not to succumb to my abject despair,
I finally failed and thus Tim there will be no second chances
I finally figured out a guaranteed way out,
And I will finally be senseless of the unrelenting hurt and pain
I have been carrying for my entire adult life.
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