Ben

This post is for my new dearest friend BEN:

Dearest Ben,

I just woke up and I know you would be on FB if I wanted to chat with you.

I love our chat sessions and they are among the few things in my day which I truly look forward to.

I know we have only begun to talk with each other for about a month, but somehow I feel as if I have always been spending my early mornings and late nights talking with you; such is the closeness that I feel we share together.

To quote a savage garden song "I think I dreamed you into life"

I would go on to continue with the other parts of the lyrics which says 'I knew I loved you before I met you' but you and I both know I am not in any position mental or emotional wise to be saying such things to you and you alone know why that is such.

I know you told me that we should take things slow and learn more things about each other and try and see whether we are still as connected as we are now  in a few months' time.

Me, however, being the impatient, and tactless person that I am just can't seem to hold back all the feelings which are burgeoning inside my heart whenever I think of you and how wonderful you are to, for and with me.

I do LOVE you although it has only been a month but I did not want to say it because I do not want to end up hurting your loving self should I still fail to let go of my past heartbreak and my one and only love up until I met you.

There has been no other man in my life before you other than my very first land last love, Darrell. 

I have told you and told you and I have written about three to four post in here detailing my strong, unquenchable feelings for that said man... so you know I have my intense and unending love for him hanging like an albatross on my neck where a relationship with you is concerened.

More than just simply being someone I might one day like to be in a romantic relationship with, you are first and foremost my very best friend (other than my two best girlfriends, Darlene and Su-Ling), the bright shining light who always manages to bring a smile to my face even when all I really one to do is cry ceaselessly and bawl uncontrollably like the day Mom left Earth to join the angels, prophets and Allah up in heaven.

But my words seems inadequate somehow so I included in this post the lyric to one of my favourite MJ song, 'BEN'. I know he wrote it for someone else, but what Michael expresses for his friend Ben is what I feel for you exactly at the very beginning of our friendship and the feelings had expended exponentially the more I discover your warm, caring, endlessly wonderful traits.

This is what I would say to you had MJ not had written these words first all those year ago:

Lyrics for Ben

Ben, the two of us need look no more, 

We both found what we were looking for.

With a friend to call my own, 

I'll never be alone, and you, my friend, will see, 

You've got a friend in me.

Ben, you're always running here and there,

You feel you're not wanted anywhere.

If you ever look behind and don't like what you find 

There's something you should know, you've got a place to go.

I used to say I and me, now it's us, now it's we.

Ben most people would turn you away;

I don't listen to a word they say.

They don't see you as I do;

I wish they would try to'

I'm sure they'd think again if they had a friend like Ben, like Ben